EXECUTIVE LONELINESS

Ever Present – Not Often Talked About

The ambition of many in professional careers is to rise to the role of Managing Director, CEO, CFO, COO or other such senior executive positions. Driven by challenge and the desire to be successful, aspirants also look at status and the prestige such a role carries and in some cases, the power appeals. For others the financial reward or wealth derived from such success is the prime motivator. On the other hand, the person on the street only sees the trappings of success –the salary/remuneration package, the top of the range vehicle, the designer suits, the executive home, the boat, the overseas holidays with family, children at private schools – the list goes on!

What is not often observed and certainly very rarely talked about however is the down side such success carries with it. The reality of an executive role is that the average working week is somewhere between 55 and 70 hours, it means catching the first flight out in the morning (5.00 am start) and catching the last flight home at night. Both domestic and international trips are invariably time sensitive and pressured for the executive who needs to maximise both time and opportunity during the trip.

For some reason no one is ever 100% relaxed with their senior or executive officer; therefore executives must be on guard at all times particularly when travelling in the company of a subordinate out of town or out of the country, a wearying factor in itself. A tired executive is a vulnerable executive.

The amount of time spent alone in strange cities/countries, in hotel rooms which forever seem to grow smaller, combined with the long and stressful daily working hours have an effect on home and family life. Above all else this impacts enormously on the personal interests of the executive which inevitably get pushed to last position in the priority queue.

Loneliness then can be a constant companion of the executive, who, because of the fast moving lifestyle has a smaller network of close friends in the main than the person in the street who has a “regular job”. Also, the nature of the executive role is such that it is easy to grow away from a circle of friends the further the career develops. Developing new and true friends is also more difficult.

Many people are unaware that handling success is very similar to coping with failure and many executives and Senior Managers find it difficult socially being put on a pedestal. Being constantly asked questions about the company, his/her position – the exciting role with all the travel… or hearing the grizzles about the share price, current company performance or numerous other business or personal matters is tiresome, business never stops for the busy executive! Many simply use any spare time to shut themselves off from people, which further exacerbates the loneliness problem.

Think also of the long weekends, particularly around regional anniversary days when the family’s weekend away gets cancelled or whilst the spouse/partner, friends and family continue on with the holiday plan, the executive travels to some management meeting which may occupy the whole weekend. Many marriage or relationship breakdowns are caused through long or constant absences resulting in the breakdown of communication and the resultant growing apart of the executive and spouse/partner.

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